This week, in my Management class, one of the
discussion topics was analyzing a personal flaw and trying to figure out the
root cause. Since I have many flaws to choose from, it was a little hard to
pick one. Eventually I settled on something and it turns out it’s a little
bigger than I thought.
You see, I’m a “Fixer”. No, I don’t pay off boxers to throw
fights (though I am currently unemployed, so I’m open to the possibility). I
like to fix things. Not just mechanical and electronic things, but
relationships and ideas. I can’t stand the idea of something not working to its
potential, and I want to analyze and figure out a way to make it better.
This “flaw” stems from my insatiable curiosity to figure out
how things work. When I was a wee lad, I used to take apart my Transformers,
screw by screw, and put them back together again just to see how they went from
car to robot and back. Occasionally I’d have an extra screw or two, but they
always functioned more or less the same as when I took them apart. Eventually I
became an electronics (and later computer/networking) technician in the Air
Force and put my fixer personality to good use.
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| Before |
If you look in my garage, you’ll find many old broken
electronics and gadgets that I can’t bear to throw away because I want to try
and fix them one day. My favorite things are the ones out of warranty, so if
it’s already broken, there’s nothing to lose trying to fix it. I’m sure my kids
were disappointed when broken iPhone screens resulted in me repairing the
screen on their old phones and not receiving a shiny new one instead.
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| Almost done |
Some of it is part of my cheap nature. I’d rather fix
something myself than pay someone more to do it elsewhere. Just this past month
I repaired an oil leak, replaced two sets of headlights, replaced a leaking
valve cover, installed a new radiator assembly and A/C core, and replaced a
hood on our cars.
Some of my fixer mentality makes it difficult for me to
sugar coat things. When I reviewed screenplays, I found it difficult to point
out the good things because I was focused on the flaws. The fixer in me saw
that something wasn’t right and I wanted to fix it. When my kids have a
performance or game, I tell them great job, but I also tell them the things
that need improvement. I don’t do it to be mean, I just want to fix it. My favorite phrase is "Yeah, but...".
I think this is one of the reasons I enjoyed the transition
to management. I now had the ability to fix people and policies. That is
certainly my favorite part about management. I want to see things improve. There
are very few things that are completely hopeless. You just have to keep
adjusting things until they fit.
I probably stayed in my first marriage longer than I should
have because I kept trying to fix it. Even if I couldn’t fix the marriage, I
wound up fixing myself in the process. It’s frustrating seeing someone unhappy,
especially if I’m involved. I feel it’s my job to find the solution to their
problem and fix it. Even if that means fixing myself.
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| This car (and company) survived the impossible. |
There are countless people that give up too early on things
and call it quits before all possibilities are exhausted. I just finished a
biography on Elon Musk (Space X, Tesla, Solar City). Reading through it was
like an alternate reality. With all the problems he faced, there was no logical
way that not only Space X could be successful, but Tesla Motors as well. Yet
the reality is today they both are. And that would not be possible if Musk didn’t
insist on fixing something he knew was fixable.
I guess I found a fix to my “flaw”. I’m a Fixer. I make
things happen.
