Saturday, October 12, 2013

Hanging around with nothing to do


I hate waiting. Waiting is different from patience. Patience is when you wait, but know there is a solution on the horizon. It may be good or bad, but you know that fate will decide, and biding your time is the best course of action. Waiting is dependent on someone else to take action. Sometimes waiting is necessary. Like waiting in line at the DMV, or waiting on the computer to finish loading that website than has your test info pending. The other type of waiting is far worse. I'm talking about Limbo.
No. This isn't about how low you can go...
Limbo is the absolute worst. It's waiting without any hint of conclusion. Being in the military, I've had my share of time in limbo. But unlike any other sort of pain, it's not something you never become immune to. It's excruciating waiting on someone that has the decision in the palm of their hands, yet they give you no indication of what direction they are going to take, or when they will make that decision.

Anyone waiting on a loan application, or a reply from a confession of love can empathize with me here. Limbo sucks. You are absolutely powerless in Limbo. noting you can do can resolve the situation. In fact, most of the time, any intervention of your part will make matters worse, and either prolong the limbo, or force a decision that most certainly will not be in your favor.

I'm well aware of the tortures of Limbo. I do my best to not delay decisions unless it's absolutely necessary. Some things are better resolved with a quick answer, but some require a night or two to sleep on it. I'm the proud owner of a 2013 Ford Explorer because I failed to sleep on that decision. But I failed my ex-wife by balking on the decision to end the misery for several years.

Limbo has many forms. It could be something as simple as hearing your favorite artist has a new album coming out, yet no release date (Seriously. Do they honestly have no clue when they are going to be done with it?). Or it could be as painful as finding out if your job will still exist three months from now (the big-wigs have already made their decision, but they don't want to hurt anyone's feelings by announcing it early).

Limbo is the absolute worst form of torture. At least if you're in Heaven or Hell, you know what to expect. Even if it's eternal damnation, at least you have a moment to prepare and accept instead of holding out for the chance at redemption..

The ultimate Limbo is to string someone along. This is where you've already made up your mind, but fail to let them know. You may think you're going to hurt them, but I assure you, the pain is far worse when you combine the torture of limbo to your negative decision. Not only will they be hurt, they will be weakened by their time in limbo. You're not doing them any favors by holding back. 

True, not every moment in Limbo ends with a negative response. You may find out you got that extension. That boy may really love you. Still, positive or negative, that time in Limbo cannot be returned. Even a positive response is still time wasted.

But this post has no moral to the story like my normal posts. This is a plea to others. Do your best to end the Limbo. You know exactly what I'm talking about. That girl that is hanging on to your every word, yet you have no intentions of taking to the next step. That customer that is waiting on your decision on that loan request. End their misery. Deep down you already know the answer. Give it to them as quickly as possible so they can move on with their lives. There are only so many days. Don't waste them by making them wait in Limbo.

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